Handle Interruptions in English — The Best Ways to Respond

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1. 0:00Interruptions. Oof.
2. 0:02These are a bit tricky in English because in English speaking culture, we prefer turn taking.
3. 0:08Think of this as a one person at a time rule.
4. 0:13And when someone interrupts or breaks a speaker's flow, generally speaking, it's considered rude.
5. 0:21It can even be viewed as having a lack of control in a conversation.
6. 0:25But not all interruptions in English are the same.
7. 0:30Some are actually collaborative and show active listening.
8. 0:34Others indicate a need for clarification, and while they might be mildly disruptive, they're really important.
9. 0:42And then there are the intrusive interruptions, the ones that try to change the topic or talk over someone.
10. 0:51In this case, the interruption is rude.
11. 0:54It may even derail you, meaning that you totally lose focus in the moment or feel like you can't follow your thoughts. These interruptions,
12. 1:04they may even shut you down.
13. 1:07So how can you best handle these situations when they happen in English?
14. 1:11What can you say to make sure that you have the opportunity to finish your thoughts and be heard in the conversation?
15. 1:19Most advice on dealing with interruptions gives you generally one answer, like assert yourself or maybe just let it go.
16. 1:28But a dismissive interruption needs a completely different response than someone who's genuinely confused.
17. 1:37So today you're going to get five specific responses matched to five different situations where someone may interrupt so that you always
18. 1:47know exactly what to do in those English conversations.
19. 1:52I want to start right away with helping you determine why an interruption happens in the first place so that you can decide the best possible response.
20. 2:02So the first is an urgent interruption when someone needs to deliver an emergency message to you, for example, alerting you to a technical glitch, of course,
21. 2:13that is worth stopping for. And in that moment, a brief, thanks for letting me know, let's get that figured out is all you need to respond.
22. 2:23And then once you do that, once you fix the technical glitch, you just continue with something like as I was saying previously.
23. 2:31Next is the I'm with you interruption, English speaking.
24. 2:35Listening culture is very verbal.
25. 2:38We use a variety of sounds and statements to show that we're engaged with you, that we're following along and paying attention. Most of the time,
26. 2:47these kinds of interruptions are considered positive and welcome.
27. 2:51In English conversations, we'll talk more about how to best respond in those situations in just a moment.
28. 2:58But for now, let's move on to a few more common interruptions.
29. 3:03The next one is the clarification interruption. For example, you hear someone say, I'm sorry, I'm not sure I understood that.
30. 3:11Could you explain it again? And of course, we want others to understand.
31. 3:15So giving space for these interruptions is important. Next, we've got the accidental cutoff.
32. 3:23To cut someone off means to stop someone else from speaking.
33. 3:28It's kind of like someone just taking the microphone away in the middle of your sentence. And sometimes we do this by accident.
34. 3:35Perhaps someone has an unexpected pause while speaking.
35. 3:40So we assume that they're finished and we jump in. In those moments.
36. 3:45If you realize that you've accidentally cut someone off, the best thing to say is, oh, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to cut you off.
37. 3:52Please continue. And lastly, we have the blatant intentional interruption.
38. 3:58This is when someone jumps in and tries to speak over you, meaning that they speak more loudly and try to cut you
39. 4:07off intentionally. This is the most difficult one to deal with, but we've got several ways to respond so that you can be sure to say what you need to say in the moment.
40. 4:19So whatever the reason for the interruption is, I want you to know exactly what is happening and how to respond in each case.
41. 4:28So the first response we wanna consider is to acknowledge the value of what someone says and then return to your topic. A moment ago,
42. 4:36I mentioned that English speaking culture values verbal listening.
43. 4:40And what this means is you're often going to hear sounds and phrases such as, Hmm, yeah, I see. That's right, exactly.
44. 4:49That's what I was thinking. These are all sounds of agreement.
45. 4:54They're sounds that your audience is listening carefully and assuming that these sounds or phrases are not too disruptive, we welcome them from time to time.
46. 5:05Someone might start with a verbal agreement with something like, exactly, that's what I was thinking too, in fact.
47. 5:13And then they might try to continue with their own story or experience.
48. 5:19If someone does get into a lengthier form of agreement, they start telling their own story. This is a good moment to just be aware.
49. 5:28You don't want to lose total control of the conversation or miss your chance to finish your thought. So in moments like this, you could certainly give someone a brief moment and then when there's a pause,
50. 5:41reclaim the conversation with something like, thanks for sharing.
51. 5:45That's a great example of what I mean. And with that, I'd like to move on to the next step. Now, similar to that, some interruptions may include valuable insight,
52. 5:57comments or even questions people might jump in to share a valuable idea or a helpful suggestion. In those situations,
53. 6:04you can gracefully acknowledge the value and then return to your own topic.
54. 6:09So here are several phrases to help you maintain control.
55. 6:14The first step is to acknowledge their idea. You can do that by saying, that's a great point. That's really interesting. I'm glad you brought that up.
56. 6:23That's a good question and that's worth thinking about.
57. 6:27Once you've said one of those acknowledgement phrases, you can go on to step two, return to your point.
58. 6:33Let me just finish my thought first, or I wanna come back to that in a moment.
59. 6:39Give me just a second to finish what I was saying or I don't wanna lose my train of thought. I'll come back to that right after this.
60. 6:47So let's put those two things together to see how they sound.
61. 6:50And there are quite a few combinations we can use here, for example. Oh, that's a great point. Let me come back to that in just a moment.
62. 6:57But I want to finish my thought first or I'd like to hear more about that.
63. 7:02Give me just a moment to finish what I was saying.
64. 7:05And here's one more that's an interesting thought.
65. 7:08Hold onto it for just a moment. Before I lose my train of thought, I wanna finish what I was saying in those examples.
66. 7:15You heard a few variations of finish my thought, and you're going to hear a few more throughout this lesson today.
67. 7:21That's intentional. These words are the clearest, most natural sign that you're not done speaking. Now, before we move on to our second way to respond,
68. 7:32I want to talk about why this response works.
69. 7:36In those moments when someone shows agreement or adds value to what you're saying, your response is showing respect to the other person's input without
70. 7:46giving up your turn.
71. 7:49This helps to keep the conversation collaborative and structured.
72. 7:53This happens not just in professional situations, but social situations too.
73. 7:58Imagine you're at dinner with friends telling a story about a trip that you just took. And while you're telling the story, someone jumps in to say, oh,
74. 8:07that happened to me too, and they start sharing their version. You can smile, give them a moment and then come back with something like, oh, I love that.
75. 8:15That's actually exactly where this story was going.
76. 8:18And then you continue with your own.
77. 8:21And now the second response to interruptions is to clarify and continue.
78. 8:26When an interruption is not meant to take over the conversation, but instead is seeking to get clarification due to confusion or missing information,
79. 8:37it's important to pause and clarify in those moments.
80. 8:40You can start by thanking them for the opportunity to explain further, then provide your clarification, confirm understanding,
81. 8:49and move on to do all of that. Here are some great phrases to help.
82. 8:54First you can start with that.
83. 8:55Acknowledgement. Thanks for that question. What I'm trying to say is, or good question to explain that a bit more,
84. 9:03or I appreciate your question. Let me try to explain it another way.
85. 9:08And finally what I meant was in each case, after you give your explanation, it's important to continue with an opportunity to make sure your clarification
86. 9:19was understood. When I do that, I prefer to use open questions.
87. 9:24It's really easy to simply say, does that make sense or did you understand?
88. 9:29And someone might just nod their head, but you don't really know if they fully understood.
89. 9:36So a better way to check understanding is to ask something like, just to be sure I explained clearly. Could you tell me how you're seeing it now?
90. 9:45Or could you run that back to me to make sure we're on the same page?
91. 9:50And finally, how does that sound to you? Once you're certain of understanding, you can get back to your topic with something like, now that we're on the same page, I'd like to finish my thoughts on,
92. 10:02or since we've cleared that up, let me get back to, so let's put this all together.
93. 10:08I want you to imagine you are discussing a change to your app launch timeline, and a coworker interrupts to ask, wait,
94. 10:17what do you mean we're delaying? Why? And in response, you could clarify by saying Thank you, yes, perhaps I left out a critical piece of information.
95. 10:26The latest updates to the platform have caused some bugs in the original coding, and the development team will need a few extra days to debug and test
96. 10:37the app. Does that clear things up? Now, one more quick thing before we move on to response three.
97. 10:42When you need to give a clarification, keep it brief.
98. 10:46The goal isn't to start over at the very beginning, but rather focus on removing the confusion and then getting back
99. 10:54to your original point. Okay, response number three is to let it go.
100. 10:59This is where we're moving into those situations where someone speaks over you and you could certainly choose to let it go.
101. 11:08This is the right approach if someone accidentally interrupts. For example, if you hear someone say, oh, I'm so sorry to cut you off, I thought you were finished.
102. 11:17Then in that moment you can respond with no problem.
103. 11:20I was just gathering my thoughts.
104. 11:22I'll finish up here in a moment and then I'd like to hear what you were going to say. But if an introduction wasn't accidental,
105. 11:29you still have the option to let it go. Sometimes it's the right call.
106. 11:34For example, if you want to reduce tension in an emotional conversation or create space for others who have been waiting to speak or simply because the
107. 11:45interruption signals that someone else is genuinely uncomfortable with the topic of conversation.
108. 11:51Letting go isn't necessarily a weakness in many situations, it's the highest form of social confidence.
109. 12:00Choosing not to fight for your turn because you don't need to, but you can also consider response number four to keep talking.
110. 12:09If the interruption is an intentional attempt to cut you off, change the topic or dominate the conversation,
111. 12:17the best response is to hold your turn and keep talking. For this, I recommend combining clear assertive statements with a simple
112. 12:27hand gesture and a smile. Let me explain.
113. 12:30The hand gesture is a super quick nonverbal signal to stop someone from interrupting.
114. 12:36This can be the universal open palm signal to stop or raising a single finger indicating that you just need one more minute to finish this.
115. 12:47Just a moment gesture can be a bit more polite than the more commanding sign to stop. Once you've got your simple hand gesture in place, you can add on a statement such as,
116. 12:58I'm just about finished or Let me finish this thought. One moment.
117. 13:03I wasn't quite finished. And while you do it, I recommend that you smile while you're speaking.
118. 13:09I know this sounds a bit strange, but here's what's important. What you say, the words you use matter, but how you say it matters more.
119. 13:19Even polite phrases can sound rude if your tone is sharp or impatient, or if your intonation sounds abrupt,
120. 13:28and that can increase tension rather than reduce it.
121. 13:32So the aim is to sound calm, steady, and in control, not defensive. Smiling instantly adds warmth to your voice,
122. 13:42and I encourage you to speak more slowly in these moments.
123. 13:47Slowing down feels a little counterintuitive, especially when someone is pushing for your turn, but the truth is speeding up in your speech signals anxiety,
124. 13:59a slower pace signals confidence, it signals control, and that you're not threatened, and that type of speaking is much harder to interrupt. Now,
125. 14:11what about those persistent interruptions?
126. 14:14Someone who is a chronic interrupter, this is where response number five comes in, address it directly.
127. 14:22If you're in a situation with someone who consistently talks over you or refuses to give you space to talk,
128. 14:30that's when it's time to assertively interrupt the interrupter.
129. 14:35I know this may not be comfortable, but ignoring repeated interruptions can lessen your authority and confidence.
130. 14:43An appropriate approach here is to be firm and calm by speaking at your original volume and using a power phrase.
131. 14:53Here are a few examples. First, you can include someone's name and say, let me finish this thought and then I'll come back to you.
132. 15:02Using someone's name makes the request specific and direct it reduces the chance that they can ignore it or pretend that your statement
133. 15:11wasn't addressed to them. Another phrase you can use is, I'd like to finish before we move on.
134. 15:18Something like this sets a clear boundary and allows you to reclaim that opportunity to speak. And here's one more.
135. 15:26I value your comments, but I'd like to finish my thoughts first and then we can have an open conversation. This one shows interest in others,
136. 15:35but also maintains respect for that turn taking culture.
137. 15:40And finally, we have, hold on a second. I'm not quite finished. It's short, it's quick and it's clear. Now, one thing to keep in mind here,
138. 15:49how directly you respond depends on the relationship and the context with a peer. For example,
139. 15:57naming someone clearly works well with a senior manager or colleague or a more formal situation. Response number four,
140. 16:07holding your term calmly and steadily may serve you better than directly addressing the behavior.
141. 16:14If someone chronically or consistently interrupts you, you may need to be more assertive and have a direct conversation about it.
142. 16:23To do that, I've got a lesson to recommend for you. After you watch this one, I recommend my lesson on how to be assertive in English.
143. 16:31I'll share a link to that lesson in the description notes below. Now, all the responses that we've talked about here are perfectly appropriate when an interruption happens,
144. 16:41but there are a couple strategies we can use to prevent interruptions from happening in the first place.
145. 16:47The first strategy is to set your expectations in advance.
146. 16:51Whether you are giving a presentation to a large audience or sharing your ideas with colleagues in a business meeting, you can set up expectations in advance.
147. 17:02What that means is that before you officially start sharing your ideas, tell your listeners that you'd like to finish speaking before they
148. 17:12add their ideas or ask questions. To do this, you can use some simple phrases like, I'd definitely like to hear your thoughts today, but before I do,
149. 17:22I want to share mine. After I walk through my recommendations for next steps, I'd like to hear from all of you. Please wait until I've finished to jump in,
150. 17:32or I think our discussion will be much more productive if I can get my thoughts out there first, and then we can open it up for questions.
151. 17:40These statements signal to your listeners that you may use some longer pauses to organize your ideas, or you may need some time to express what you want. But when you're ready,
152. 17:52you'll open up the opportunity for those comments and questions. Now, the second strategy to prevent interruptions from happening is to control your
153. 18:01voice so that it sounds strong, calm, and confident.
154. 18:05One way to do that is to maintain control of your intonation.
155. 18:09For more on this, I recommend watching my lesson titled American Intonation Patterns, how to Reduce Interruptions and Send Clear Messages. Again,
156. 18:19I'll share a link directly to that lesson in the description notes below.
157. 18:24On top of your intonation, I also recommend deep breathing from your belly.
158. 18:30This helps your voice sound clear and stronger.
159. 18:34It gives your voice more resonance, that warmth and depth that carries your voice across a room without actually having to raise your volume or shout to be heard.
160. 18:45I recommend that you try it before your next meeting.
161. 18:49Breathe in slowly through your nose.
162. 18:51Let your stomach expand rather than your chest and exhale steadily while you speak. So now whether you're in the middle of a meeting,
163. 19:01giving a presentation or having a conversation with a friend, you have exactly what you need to handle whatever interruption comes your way. Throughout the lesson today,
164. 19:12you may have noticed that a lot of what we covered, things like reading the room, controlling your voice, and navigating cultural expectations,
165. 19:21these all go beyond just knowing the right phrases in the moment.
166. 19:27This combination of skills is exactly what we focus on inside My Fluency School program.
167. 19:34Not only do we cover the phrases and questions to use in everything from small talk to meaningful in-depth conversations,
168. 19:42but we also incorporate cultural know-how expectations and understanding.
169. 19:49If that sounds like something you need for your English conversations, I'll share a link where you can find out more in the description notes below.
170. 19:57And one more thing before we finish up for today.
171. 20:00I'd really love to hear from you.
172. 20:01I want to know which of these five responses feels most useful to you right now? Take a moment to tell me in the comments. As always, if you found this lesson helpful,
173. 20:13don't forget to subscribe or follow wherever you're watching or listening from today. Thank you so much for joining me, and I look forward to next time.